11 MOVIES THAT EXEMPLIFY AND TEACH CHILDREN EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE

In the African culture, folktales or storytelling were and are still a way to raise children. I still have vivid memories of folktales told to me by my late granddad and the moral lessons that he emphasized. These moral lessons ranged from contentment, cleanliness, integrity, empathy, kindness, honor, respect, emotional regulation awareness, and many more. I discovered modern parents don’t exactly tell folktales or stories and by my training as a social worker, I know children can be strongly influenced by visual or graphic representations. Aside from (SLCN) speech, language, and communication needs, visual or graphic representations aid children in developing a correct understanding of life and the world around them, as well as helping their curiosity which is important for mental development. Movies are a huge part of learning which can or has replaced folktales. My focus is EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE as I recommend 11 movies that exemplify and teach children emotional intelligence. Please note that as important as film ratings are, I recommend parental guidance no matter the rating or age of the child; if possible, watch the movie together with the child or children

WONDER

Bullying, self-worth, self-concept, respect, tolerance for difference, and acceptance are all topics covered in this movie. The story follows 10-year-old August Pullman, who was born with Treacher Collins Syndrome, a facial deformity that has required him to have up to 27 surgeries and move from hospital to hospital. He has lived all of his life with his family, his dog Daisy, and himself in his house. Up until now, his mother has been his primary educator; however, it’s now time for him to face his greatest obstacle and enter the world. For the first time, he should attend school and make an effort to fit in with his peers and teachers despite being unique.

Recommended ages: 7+ Rated: G

After the film Discussion with your ward(s)

• What is bullying?
• What do they understand as self-worth and respect?
• Do they understand the importance of tolerance and acceptance of others?

BEAUTY AND THE BEAST

An arrogant prince becomes an ugly beast by magic. The beast kidnaps Belle, a young lady, and holds her imprisoned in his castle while he attempts to break the curse. As her people march to exterminate the beast, she begins to realize his inner beauty. Kids will be enthralled with Disney’s Beauty and the Beast movie due to its music, storyline, and animations, which will prompt them to consider the nature of appearances.

Recommended ages: 6+ Rated: G

After the film Discussion with your ward(s)

•              What is Belle feeling when she agrees to be the Beast’s captive?

•              Why is Gaston surprised that Belle doesn’t want to marry him?

•              Why do the villagers want to destroy the beast?

INSIDE OUT

The emotions of Riley, an 11-year-old girl, are the subject of the animated Pixar movie Inside Out. In the movie, some characters represent Fear, Anger, Sadness, Joy, and Disgust. To ensure Riley makes the best choices possible in life, they have to collaborate. Despite being more somber than other Pixar films, Inside Out teaches children valuable lessons about emotions.  Inside Out is great for kids with attention issues.

Recommended ages: 6+ Rated: G

After the film Discussion with your ward(s)

• Why is it hard for Riley to tell her parents how she is feeling?
• How does Bing Bong feel when he helps Joy escape?
• What does it mean to have “mixed emotions” about something?

ZOOTOPIA

In a world where animals can talk, a rabbit named Judy Hopps and a fox named Nick Wilde team up to solve a kidnapping case. Zootopia is an exciting crime mystery that has lots of jokes that will go over kids’ heads (and that parents might love). But it’s a great tool for helping kids learn about tolerance and the danger of stereotypes.

Recommended ages: 9+ Rated: PG

After the film Discussion with your ward(s)

• What kinds of stereotypes do the animals of Zootopia have about rabbits and foxes?
• How do Judy’s and Nick’s opinions about each other change in the film?
• Is there something human society can learn from Zootopia?

SOUL

Joe is a music instructor at a middle school, and things haven’t quite gone as planned in his life. His genuine love is jazz, and he plays it well. However, he quickly learns what it is to have a soul when he goes to another realm to assist someone in discovering their true purpose. This is a film connecting you with the purpose of life, passion, and soul.

Recommended ages: 12+ Rated: PG

After the film Discussion with your ward(s)

• What is soul?
• What is the purpose of life?
• What is life and death?
• Why is it important to cherish every day?

THE GOOD DINOSAUR

The story of a boy and his dinosaur, in a world where dinosaurs and humans live side-by-side, an Apatosaurus named Arlo makes an unlikely human friend. above everything else, even close friendships, family is cherished.  courage is key, although fear is natural and good, it shouldn’t prevent you from living your life; you can overcome it and find beauty on the other side. Valuing traits like kindness, loyalty, encouragement, and resourcefulness are crucial.

Recommended ages: 12+ Rated: PG

After the film Discussion with your ward(s)

• What is courage and why is it important?
• Why is Kindness, loyalty, encouragement, and resourcefulness all important?
• Why Fear is normal and healthy?

FIDDLER ON THE ROOF

This is an epic musical story of Jews in Ukraine facing religious persecution while trying to hold on to their traditions. The main character is Tevye. He butts heads with his daughters over marriage, and they are all threatened by a hostile government. Fiddler on the Roof can help kids understand how cultures shape people.

Recommended ages: 12+ Rated: PG

After the film Discussion with your ward(s)

• What is culture and religion?
• Why do Tevye and his daughters disagree about marriage?
• Do you know of any people today who are persecuted because of their religion?

NAPOLEON DYNAMITE

This is a movie about a social misfit in high school. People that follow a different rhythm could be similar to Napoleon Dynamite. The film’s diverse cast of characters serves as a wonderful starting point for discussions about how special each individual is. This movie points to the importance of individual uniqueness.

Recommended ages: 12+ Rated: PG

After the film Discussion with your ward(s)

• Is Napoleon’s life in a small town in Idaho like or different from your life?
• How do Napoleon and Pedro try to show that they care about others?
• What kinds of hopes do the different characters in the film have?

PURSUIT OF HAPPINESS

Chris Gardner (Will Smith), a single parent, finds life difficult. After being forced out of their residence, he is left alone and without a place to live with his young son, Jaden Christopher Syre Smith. Chris does finally get an internship with a famous brokerage business, but it is an unpaid post. Chris is fighting to make a better life for himself and his son, even though the two must live in shelters and face numerous obstacles. Despite this, Chris never gives up.

Recommended ages: 13+ Rated: PG

After the film Discussion with your ward(s)

• Perseverance and diligence are important keys to success.
• Setbacks are a part of life
• Why it is important to not lose your joy no matter the situation you’re in?

TO KILL A MOCKINGBIRD

“You never really understand a person until you consider things from his point of view.” So says Atticus Finch, a lawyer who decides to defend a Black man accused of rape in the 1930s Deep South. This classic film teaches kids about the impact of racism. To Kill a Mockingbird can also help kids understand the importance of not judging others by their appearance.

Recommended ages: 13+ Rated: PG

After the film Discussion with your ward(s)

• Do you think you stand up like Atticus to fight for what’s right?
• Why is the character Boo Radley so misunderstood?
• What do you think the jurors are thinking as they consider the case?

THE BOY THE MOLE THE FOX AND THE HORSE

A child, a mole, a fox, and a horse; four odd friends share life’s lessons while looking for a place to call home. The boy discovers, nevertheless, that home isn’t necessarily a set location. This movie is great. Every dialogue is an emotional masterpiece. I can’t describe in words how beautiful it is, you just need to watch and see for yourself.

Recommended ages: 5+ Rated: PG

After the film Discussion with your ward(s)

• it’s alright to hurt and it’s alright to feel lost
• we all face storms in life, but they always pass.
• What does it mean to feel lost?
• we all feel a bit lost sometimes, and it’s how we react to things that define us.

CHILDREN & EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE

Emotional intelligence is the ability to use feelings and emotions adequately and appropriately. it is the ability to recognize and feel our own emotions as well as those of others. We are required to effectively recognize, understand, and productively react to emotions thus making us emotionally intelligent. EI as it is fondly called is required of every adult, it is abnormal for an adult not to have reasonable emotional intelligence but very normal for children to be excused when they don’t show or demonstrate emotional intelligence.

The essence of this write-up is to show the importance of EI for children and not just adults. Studies have shown that the majority of adults with sound EI were taught the skill of EI from childhood. Even the holy book recommends we ‘’train up a child in a way he should g and when they grow, they won’t depart from it’’ – Proverbs 22:6.

Sound emotional intelligence is developed in childhood, so parents and guardians must task themselves with the responsibility of teaching their children to be emotionally intelligent.  When we talk about EI as it involves children the term ‘’emotional self-regulation’’ comes to bear. Deliberately teaching children how to regulate their emotions is what makes them turn out to be emotionally stable and balanced adults. Children must be taught that emotions and feelings are inherent in them and serve a purpose, they must be taught to understand and accept emotions before they can be controlled and expressed. Emotions are not a hindrance but rather an essential aspect of human development. The discrete theory of emotions states that each of our primary emotions has evolved to serve specific purposes and affect our behavior. I can boldly say it is emotions that form and control behavior, thus a well-behaved adult is a result of sound emotions or emotional intelligence.

The concept of Emotional Intelligence was made popular by the 1995 book, Emotional Intelligence: Why It Can Matter More Than IQ. The author, psychologist Daniel Goleman, described EI using five basic parts.

Self-awareness: The ability to be aware of one’s feelings at any given time as well as how one’s mood affects other people.

Self-regulation: The capacity to control one’s feelings. They deliberate before taking hasty action.

Motivation: The capacity to accomplish goals in the face of negative or distracting feelings.

Empathy: The ability to sense another person’s feelings is known as empathy.

Social skills: The capacity to manage communication with others. They know what behaviors make other people feel good about themselves.

To equip children with sound emotional intelligence parents and guardians must do the following

* Encourage positive behavior and progress.

* Avoid negative labels by setting an example of positive behavior.

* Be empathetic and attentive, thus modeling it to them.

* Promote and encourage self-expression.

* Intentionally reward and recognize the solving of problems.

* Portray behaviors and activities that encourage their Self-Awareness Development

In conclusion, we must understand that all feelings are acceptable, even while certain behaviors are not. Promote your child’s problem-solving skills to help them learn how to control their emotions. Regulate the expression of appropriate behavior. This means supporting your child in creating goals and devising strategies to reach those goals.  At times, the stages of emotional learning may proceed quickly. In other circumstances, finishing these activities can take a lengthy time. Being patient is the key. If the problem is big, it’s not required to complete several procedures in one encounter. Discuss challenges. Ask kids how they feel about things while they’re having trouble. Name the emotions: happiness, anger, sadness, devastation, etc., and also ascertain the cause of the emotion they just mentioned. Act on it. Enumerate every method that kids could have behaved differently to get a different outcome. Emotion regulation is a key component of emotional intelligence (EI), which is used to solve problems. To help children develop empathy, involve them in activities that require them to take care of others who are in need.  Research has shown that children with learning difficulties like dyslexia are most likely to portray high EI. Parents in Africa especially must see parenting as stewardship and that they will be held accountable to God and the larger society. Parenting is beyond paying school fees and providing food and shelter. Parents must be intentional in knowing the key strengths and weaknesses of their children because teaching emotional intelligence and raising them generally is tied to their unique strengths and weaknesses, special abilities, and inabilities. A parent with 3 kids, for instance, is not supposed to raise them the same way, you raise them based on their unique personalities.

DISCLAIMER: Please note, that no copyright infringement is intended, and I do not own nor claim rights to any of the pictures/images used in this blog post, they are only used as an illustration for the write-up.

IS IT POSSIBLE TO RAISE TRUAMA-FREE CHILDREN?

Is it possible to raise trauma-free children? is one question that is lingering in my heart.

According to Medical News Today; “Trauma is when we experience very stressful, frightening, or distressing events that are difficult to cope with or out of our control. It could be one incident or an ongoing event that happens over a long period”.  My main focus is childhood trauma and not just trauma because it is childhood trauma that a lot of times defines trauma in adulthood.

Childhood trauma has no chain of circumstances as it varies among individuals and is influenced by factors like their ability to process the incident with appropriate support systems.

Children whose families and homes do not provide consistent safety, comfort, and protection may develop ways of coping that allow them to survive and function day to day. For instance, they may be overly sensitive to the moods of others, always watching to figure out what the adults around them are feeling and how they will behave. They may withhold their own emotions from others, never letting them see when they are afraid, sad, or angry. These kinds of learned adaptations make sense when physical and/or emotional threats are ever-present. As a child grows up and encounters situations and relationships that are safe, these adaptations are no longer helpful and may be counterproductive and interfere with the capacity to live, love, and be loved.

Common Examples of Events/Circumstances That Cause Trauma:

• Witnessing domestic violence
• Bullying
• Childhood sexual or physical abuse
• Community or school violence
• Loss of a loved one
• Neglect
• Serious illness or accident

Signs of Childhood Trauma

The signs of childhood trauma include; Post-Traumatic stress disorder(PTSD), Attachment and relationships, Emotional regulation and responses, and Physical Health.

The most common sign of childhood trauma is Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder(PTSD). This is a very specific mental health issue that doesn’t develop in everyone who experiences trauma. Only a small percentage of children experience PTSD after a traumatic experience. 

Signs of PTSD include: Reliving the event (flashbacks or nightmares), Anxiety, Depression, Anger, Problems with trust, Self-destructive or risky behaviors, and Withdrawal. Most adults who show these signs have been proven to have unresolved PTSD from their childhood.

Problems forming relationships and attachments are another indicator of childhood trauma that persists into adulthood. For instance, you might grow to distrust adults if a loved one or caregiver caused your childhood trauma. This mistrust may persist into adulthood and hinder your capacity to build relationships with other people.

 Alternatively, it could be a pattern of entering into unhealthy relationships with negative people because that is what you were taught as a child (for example, a victim of abuse may marry an abusive spouse). Whatever the situation, it could indicate unresolved childhood trauma if you find it difficult to establish positive relationships with your peers.

An additional consequence of childhood trauma could be difficulty controlling emotions. This issue can show up in a variety of ways, such as uncontrollable rage, anxiety, depression, difficulty expressing emotions, and withdrawal. These instances can be more or less. Childhood trauma can have a direct impact on the physical well-being of an individual just like it does on their mental well-being.

For example, studies have shown that children who go through abuse have a huge chance of developing major health conditions like diabetes, stroke, etc. They also are likely to commit suicide as adults.

Finally, not every child who has experienced a traumatic event develops traumatic stress or disorder, some just inherently adjust and heal. We need to understand that many children who adjust and heal do so because they receive the right support. As important as it is to strive to raise trauma-free children we realize that some level of trauma is inevitable as part of life. Open communication and the provision of a secure, caring, and supportive environment, ultimately lower the risk of serious trauma, also, especially when the child’s SPIRITUAL, emotional, physical, and mental health is prioritized. In some cases, involving professional assistance goes a long way.

I will advise that parenting be very intentional, parents should educate themselves. They should learn about the common triggers and reactions that children have with traumatic events. Know when to seek support from a mental health professional, and avoid blame, making sure the kids are always assured that they are safe. Activities and interactions that encourage self-esteem are a must. Every parent must be a good listener, and must above all be patient. It is also important for parents to set the right standard of SPIRITUAL GROWTH, love, peace, accountability, hard work, rewards, accolades, financial discipline, and Support for the children to follow as they are born.

Check one of my previous write-ups for more insight; https://savingthechild.wordpress.com/2014/05/18/signs-to-know-a-child-is-suffering-from-abuse/

HERITAGE & INHERITANCE

This is a very serious topic to write on, but I decided to write on it, to give my perspective on what I feel heritage and inheritance is or should be. According to etymonline.com  heritage is “that which may be inherited,” from Old French iritage, eritage, heritage “heir; inheritance, ancestral estate, heirloom,” from heriter “inherit,” from Late Latin hereditare, ultimately from Latin heres (genitive heredis) “heir” (see heredity). Meaning “condition or state transmitted from ancestors” is from 1620s.  inheritance on the other hand is from the late 14c., as enheritaunce “fact of receiving by hereditary succession;” early 15c. as “that which is or may be inherited,” from Anglo-French and Old French enheritaunce, from Old French enheriter “make heir, appoint as heir” (see inherit). Heritance “act of inheriting” is from mid-15c.

Heritage unlike inheritance is very broad but my focus is on family heritage and inheritance. Habits, attitudes, traditions, and beliefs that are carried down through the generations within a family are referred to as family heritage. Family inheritance describes the possessions, assets, and things that are passed down within a family across generations or a generation. It encompasses both tangible and intangible assets, such as values, knowledge, and abilities passed down from ancestors.  From my perspective, intangible heritage is what gives inheritance more meaning. I believe that every family should have a heritage, every man as the leader of his family should set a godly heritage for his family and generations yet to come.

The Bible emphasizes the importance of heritage and inheritance. Inheritance was crucial for the Israelites as it determined land ownership and family lineage. The concept of passing down possessions, blessings, and responsibilities from one generation to another is prevalent throughout the Bible. Inheritance as a Blessing*: Proverbs 13:22, states, “A good person leaves an inheritance for their children’s children, but a sinner’s wealth is stored up for the righteous.” This verse highlights the value of leaving behind a legacy of blessings for future generations. In the New Testament, the concept of inheritance extends beyond material possessions to include spiritual blessings. In 1 Peter 1:3-4, believers are said to have “an inheritance that can never perish, spoil or fade.” Inheritance through Christ: Christians are considered heirs of God and co-heirs with Christ, inheriting the promises of salvation and eternal life. Romans 8:17 gives credence to this, stating, “Now if we are children, then we are heirs—heirs of God and co-heirs with Christ.” 

Heritage and inheritance hold great significance and are deeply rooted in cultural traditions and practices in Africa. They are vital in shaping family structures, social relationships, and economic systems across diverse African societies. In many African cultures, inheritance is not limited to material possessions but encompasses intangible assets such as family history, knowledge, and customs. Ancestral heritage, oral traditions, and rituals are passed down from one generation to the next, preserving the cultural identity of communities.  Land inheritance is a prominent aspect of African heritage, especially in agrarian societies. Land is not only a source of economic sustenance but also a symbol of ancestral connection and belonging. Inheritance of land rights and usage is governed by customary laws that vary among ethnic groups. African inheritance often follows a patrilineal or matrilineal system, where descent and inheritance are traced through either the father’s or mother’s lineage. Extended family networks play a crucial role in inheritance arrangements, ensuring the continuity of family ties and obligations. Gender roles and norms influence inheritance practices in Africa. In some cultures, male heirs are prioritized in the distribution of assets, while in others, women have equal inheritance rights. Changing social dynamics and legal reforms are challenging traditional gender biases in inheritance laws. Inheritance can serve as a means of economic empowerment for individuals and families in Africa. Access to inherited resources, such as land, livestock, or business ventures, can provide a foundation for socio-economic mobility and wealth accumulation. Heritage and inheritance in Africa are multifaceted concepts shaped by cultural traditions, family dynamics, gender norms, and socio-economic factors. These aspects reflect the diversity and complexity of African societies, highlighting the interconnectedness between traditions and contemporary challenges in the realm of inheritance.

 In conclusion, having looked at the cultural, spiritual, and historical perspectives of heritage and inheritance. TRUE HERITAGE & INHERITANCE SHOULD BE CHARACTERIZED BY FIVE THINGS; THE FEAR OF GOD, INTEGRITY, POSSESSIONS, BLESSINGS, and RESPONSIBILITIES. To break it down, A father should show his children the way of the lord, a father should engrave in his children discipline, hard work, and uprightness, teaching them to stand for their principles regardless. A father should wisely give his children a Head Start in terms of physical possession as much as they can handle having understood their capacity and capabilities. A father should always bless his children and give them responsibilities as early as possible. I need to state that I am for men and women having equal inheritance rights, if both male and female children pick genetic heritage from their parents they should be part of all other forms of heritage. Just as the Bible teaches that heritage and inheritance are not just about material wealth or possessions but also about spiritual blessings, promises, and responsibilities passed down through generations. inheritance comes with the responsibility of stewardship. A father should teach his children stewardship and skills in managing, growing, and sustaining heritage and inheritance. God encourages us to steward our blessings and resources wisely, as seen in the parable of the talents in Matthew 25:14-30. It emphasizes the sustenance of generational heritage.

THE ‘GIRLCHILD’ IS THE BEDROCK OF WEALTH CREATION AND SUSTENANCE. (PART 2)

The idea of the ‘’girlchild’’ as the bedrock of wealth creation and sustenance draws attention to the significant role that women and girls play in the economic advancement of any society. A lot of females who receive equal opportunity, education, and empowerment make substantial contributions to the generation and maintenance of wealth in diverse ways. Like I said in part one, “The girlchild is the best and biggest afterthought by God”.  Now I can even say that though arguable, they are smarter than the male child. I have yet to see any of the wealthiest or most successful men in the world who didn’t have a girlfriend, wife, mother, or female friend contribute to their success story, directly or indirectly.

The girlchild can and has contributed immensely to inventions, innovations, education, entrepreneurship, family life, and community development. I defined the key terminologies in part one of this write-up to help give proper context. Women and girls bring distinct viewpoints and ideas to the table, which spurs creativity and the creation of new goods and services. Societies can and have gained from the inventiveness and problem-solving abilities of girls by encouraging them to pursue careers in STEM disciplines (Science, Technology, Engineering, and Mathematics) and other fields dominated by men.

Putting money into girls’ education guarantees that they will have the know-how to launch enterprises, engage in the workforce, and make wise financial decisions. Girls with more education have a higher chance of landing better employment and making more money, which can support economic growth in general.

Women and girls have been known to generate wealth not only for themselves but also for their families and communities when they are provided with the tools and encouragement needed to launch and expand their enterprises. It has been demonstrated that women-owned enterprises affect regional economies. A lot of families and communities would not have experienced growth if not for them.

They are continually essential in managing household finances and resources. Once empowered, they go on to make wise financial decisions, and as natural caregivers, a lot of them are inclined to financial literacy, thus assisting their families in building wealth and securing a better future.  The assertion that” Stronger, more resilient communities result from empowered women and girls” shows itself to be true when you compare the Western world to Africa. It will state the obvious that When girls are educated, healthy, and financially independent, they can support sustainable development initiatives, advocate for social change, and enhance society as a whole.

Numerous notable women have made significant contributions to wealth creation and sustenance all over the world. Here are just a few examples:

1. Ngozi Okonjo-Iweala is a Nigerian-American economist and international development expert who currently serves as the Director-General of the World Trade Organization (WTO). She is the first woman and the first African to hold this position. Okonjo-Iweala has had a distinguished career in various international organizations, including the World Bank, where she served as Managing Director, and as Nigeria’s Finance Minister. She is known for her expertise in economic development, finance, and trade, and has received numerous awards and honors for her contributions to Nigerian and global economics.

2. Oprah Winfrey: A media mogul, television host, actress, producer, and philanthropist, Oprah Winfrey has built a multi-billion-dollar media empire. She is known for her successful talk show, “The Oprah Winfrey Show,” as well as her production company and OWN television network.

3. Indra Nooyi: Former CEO of PepsiCo, Indra Nooyi is a trailblazing businesswoman who transformed the food and beverage company into a global powerhouse during her tenure. She is known for her strategic leadership and focus on sustainability and diversity.

4. Sara Blakely: Founder of Spanx, Sara Blakely revolutionized the shapewear industry with her innovative products and marketing strategies. She started Spanx with just $5,000 in savings and grew it into a billion-dollar business.

5. Alice Walton: Heiress to the Walmart fortune, Alice Walton is one of the richest women in the world. She is known for her philanthropic work and contributions to the arts, including the founding of the Crystal Bridges Museum of American Art.

6. Thasunda Brown Duckett: Thasunda Brown Duckett is the CEO of TIAA, a leading financial services company. She is a prominent figure in the finance industry and is known for her strategic leadership and commitment to financial empowerment and inclusion.

7. Ursula Burns: Ursula Burns is a pioneering businesswoman who served as the CEO of Xerox, becoming the first black woman to head a Fortune 500 company. She is known for her leadership and strategic vision in the technology and business services industry

8. Folorunso Alakija: Folorunso Alakija is a Nigerian businesswoman, philanthropist, and one of the richest women in Africa. She is the founder of Famfa Oil Limited, a Nigerian oil exploration company, and has diversified investments in real estate, fashion, and printing industries.

9. Stella Okoli: Stella Okoli is the founder and CEO of Emzor Pharmaceutical Industries Limited, one of Nigeria’s leading pharmaceutical companies. She is a trailblazing entrepreneur known for her contributions to the healthcare industry and her commitment to quality healthcare products all over Nigeria.

6. Ibukun Awosika: Ibukun Awosika is a renowned entrepreneur, author, and motivational speaker who serves as the chairman of First Bank of Nigeria Limited. She is a trailblazing businesswoman known for her leadership in the banking sector and her advocacy for entrepreneurship and women empowerment.

In conclusion, investing in the education, economic empowerment, and social well-being of girls is essential in acknowledging their significance as the bedrock of wealth creation and sustenance. Encouraging and supporting women to realize their full potential can open up a world of opportunities and promote sustainable economic growth for countries in Africa and around the world.

THE ‘GIRL CHILD’ AS THE BEDROCK OF WEALTH CREATION AND SUSTENANCE

Example of a Mother (‘girl child’)

Saying that the ‘girl child’ is the best and biggest after thought by God is stating the obvious! The ‘girl child’  refers to every woman(female child). Women are the biggest driving force to wealth creation and sustenance. Aside the care giving nature of women which makes a lot of them put the welfare of others(their children, siblings, relatives and friends) first. Women as mothers, are the main upholders of the family which is the  most important unit of society.  Mothers are the more active parent in child upbringing thus they get to spend a lot more time with the children, nurturing them physically, shaping them in character  and providing them informal education and good understanding of their environment. You can barely see a successful  man or woman who did not have so much inputs from their mothers. Across different cultures and traditions all over the world mothers are the biggest cheer leaders of their children, they will barely loose faith in their child no matter how badly the situation.

EMOTIONALISM & CHILD UPBRINGING

Emotionalism according to www.dictionary.com is 1. Excessive emotional character ; the emotionalism of sentimental  fiction  2.Strong or excess appeal to the emotions; the emotionalism of patriotic propaganda. 3. A tendency to display emotions freely or to rely on or place too much value on emotion; undue display of emotion.

DEAR FATHER!!, WOULD YOU WANT YOUR DAUGHTER TO MARRY YOU?

Happy New Month folks!!! Its me Obichukwu again. this is a write -up that has questions that can only be answered by a father and husband who needs to change in order to be a good example to his daughter(s) and an intending father and husband who needs to put in place a good foundation for his marital life.

UNDERSTANDING; P.M.S(PREMENSTRUAL SYNDROME) IN WOMEN.

I choose to write on this topic mainly cause of the male folks, i feel very few men understand and know what PMS is all about. Men need to understand that women do not just “act up” for no reason, and understanding PMS will go long way in helping them relate better with their mothers, sisters, wives and daughters. Remember, this Blog is also centered around the upliftment of the “GIRL CHILD” .   Some of the key symptoms of PMS  which we will see below, go a long way in explaining why women behave in certain ways a lot of the times.

New Year resolutions…..

Wow!  This video says it all!  We recommend that this guides your resolutions, targets and goals for the year…  Especially after submitting them to God almighty.   HAPPY NEW YEAR ! You will flourish in all aspects of your life in 2017 and beyond!!!!!!

CHECKLIST FOR KIDS & PARENTS

Hello Fam! and compliments of the season!  So I decided to share thoughts from one my books that i value so much. The book is titled     “WHAT KIDS NEED TO SUCCEED” (by – Peter L.  Benson, Ph. D.,  Etal..) The authors of this book came up with a checklist after carrying out a nationwide survey of over 270,000 young people in 600 commuinties in the U. S. A . They are over Twenty of them,  but I proned it down to ten that I feel is suitable  to our environment here in Nigeria. This checklist helps parents identify traits their kids already have and the one they need.

​YOUR CHILDREN FOLLOW YOUR EXAMPLE NOT YOUR ADVICE..

Like i will always say, this is me sharing my thoughts. We all know what is right is right and what is wrong is wrong. This topic  struck me when i visited a relative and i got to see an unpleasant situation. All around you see parents and guardians who feel they can get away with any of their actions cause they are adults.

PARENTS MUST DEFINE SUCCESS FOR THEIR CHILDREN

Mother and daughter with homework

PARENTS MUST DEFINE SUCCESS FOR THEIR CHILDREN SO THE WORLD DOES NOT DEFINE IT FOR THEM AND CALL THEM FAILURES. This is one topic that gave me cause to really think deeply. I can’t say I have arrived in life, but I can boldly say that I am not where I used to be and I also cannot say I have all the credentials that defines or points to success. I just want to share my thoughts and understanding as it concerns success, and how parents should see and define it for their children.

HELPING OUR CHILDREN UNDERSTAND LIFE’S SEASONS – PART 1

Happy family cooking together and having fun

Life is generally  ruled by times and seasons, even the holy scripture says a lot about seasons; Eccl. 3 : 1, Luke 21 : 25 – 27….. Nigeria is in a very tough season of hardship and difficulties that will pass away just like the early 80s especially 1983 from my findings.

FAULTY FAMILY ANTECEDENTS & THE ROLE OF PARENTS

The role of the family as the most important social institution cannot be overemphasized. For me, after God its family…. (Ephesians 3 : 14 – 15). Apart from God, the biggest driver of the family is marriage; i.e husband and wife who now evolve to mother and father(parents). As important as family is, the father and most especially the mother are too important in the family make-up because of their role in shaping the next generation.

RECOMMENDATIONS ON BEING A GOOD HUSBAND & A GOOD FATHER

Yeaaaa! this is my first post for the year 2016! and i am really excited about it cause its emphatic, instructive and its from the supreme book of wisdom.  I stumbled on this topic and was  reluctant to publish it, up until this moment. The beauty of this post(RECOMMENDATIONS ON BEING A GOOD HUSBAND AND A GOOD FATHER), is that it has nothing to do with man’s knowledge or wisdom, but solely the wisdom of God, who is the sole patent owner of marriage and family, which a father and a husband is a key actor in. like i’ll always say, whether you are a parent, guardian, aspiring parent, widow, widower, bachelor, spinster etc. Take out time to read this.

7 CHILD RELATED QUOTES FOR THE SEASON

We all know what the number seven (7) represents and stands for, which is why i decided to go with it. The main aim of this post is to share with our parents on some KEY TRUTHS of child upbringing……

This can be debated, but the key truth is, parents must deliberately spend time with their kids no matter how busy,(especially fathers).

10 Best Educational Websites for Kids

In these modern times,kids could easily become addicted to technology, especially as they grow older. But we all know that not everything online is good for our children. there are lots of things there that can do them harm. As a parent, your job is to provide your kids with only the safe sites for them to visit. Sites that will give them knowledge at the same time enjoyment. These are the top ten educational websites for kids.

For parents in Africa, click on this link=Emeka Obi-chukwu Ewenike before you go further.

I carefully put in direct links to each of the websites, enjoy it!!

1. PBS Kids – the official website of the PBS channel is perfect to recap all your favorite PBS shows (Clifford, Curious George, SuperWhy, The Cat in the Hat, and a lot more) and also learn by playing their games.  pbskids.org

2. Wonderopolis – is where the wonders of learning never stops. Your children will discover a new fact each day. We all know that children loves to ask bizarre questions. This is the site that can answer them all.  Why are they called Lava Lamps? What Badger has a sweet tooth? A very great informative site. wonderopolis.org

3. National Geographic Little Kids and Kids – official site of National Geographic kids features games, crafts and recipes, science, videos, and animal information. It’s perfect for children 10 and below. kids.nationalgeographic.com

4. Fun Brain – is a great and enjoyable site for children to learn Math as well as some reading stuffs.www.funbrain.com

5. Whyville – Perfect for children 10-15 years old or the tweens. It is a very informative, interactive and enjoyable site – perfect for playing educational games an sozializing. whyville.com

6. Pottermore – for those children who loves Harry Potter, this is the perfect site. Full of interactive features and games plus never before read parts of the HP books. My kids LOVE it and can’t wait for all the books to be on the site (as of the writing, the site only opens four books).  www.pottermore.com

7. Spatulatta – Cooking is one of the most enjoyable and rewarding activity that parents and children can share. This website will help you do just that.  Get into cooking on this kid-friendly cooking website with lots of videos and recipes.  www.spatulatta.com

8. NGA Kids – perfect website for kids who are artful. From the National Gallery of Art. www.nga.gov/kids/kids

9. Yahoo Kids – this is the least educational of all the choices since the site includes both games and videos of all sorts. But, kids can find lots to learn on this interactive website like homework help, learning about science, and access to an encyclopedia. www.tvmuse.com/sites-guide/kids.yahoo.com

10. Nickelodeon – Some nick cartoons get negative feed backs (such as Spongebon) but kids really enjoy them and there are really lessons to be learned in each cartoons. Their website is the same…  

So there you have it, the top 10 sites for kids.  Did I miss your favorite websites? What are they? Comment it here and let us help other parents determine the best sites for their children.  www.nick.com

CREDITS: www.capecodkidz.com

Children Need Time — By: Remi Makanjuola

Children need time

I was about to publish a post titled  ” AFRICAN CULTURES AND THE GIRL CHILD” but i decided to do more research on it. So enjoy this  post by  my mentor.

THE MYSTERY OF DYSLEXIA

Albert Einstein was one of the prominent persons that had dyslexia

According to the British Dyslexia Association ,Dyslexia is a LEARNING DIFFICULTY that primarily affects the skills involved in accurate and fluent word reading and spelling. B.D.A describes Dyslexia as mainly characterized by;
Difficulties in phonological awareness, verbal memory and verbal processing speed occurring across the range of intellectual abilities. Furthermore; Dyslexia is a specific learning difficulty that mainly affects the development of literacy and language related skills. It is likely to be present at birth and to be life-long in its effects. In addition to these characteristics, the BDA acknowledges the visual and auditory processing difficulties that some individuals with dyslexia experience, and points out that dyslexic readers can show a combination of abilities and difficulties that affect the learning process. Its in the class of ADHD (Attention Deficit and Hyperactivity Disorder) and Autism i.e a learning difficulty/disorder.

YOU MUST SHAPE A CHILD SO YOU DON’T MEND AN ADULT- PART 2 (CONCLUSION)

                                                                                                                                             Having laid a foundation for this topic;(https://savingthechild.wordpress.com/2015/06/19/you-must-shape-a-child-so-you-dont-mend-an-adult-part-1/#more-296 ). I’ll go straight into finalizing this discuss. The mind is the part of a person by which he/she thinks, remembers, desires, perceives, feel, and imagines etc.

You Must Shape A Child, So You Don’t Mend an Adult- Part 1

There is so much wisdom and direction in the holy book especially as it concerns this topic; ” Train up a child in a way it should go (and in keeping with his individual gift or bent) and when he is old he will not depart from it” – Prov. 22 v 6(amp). From this portion of scriptures, there are two key words that are emphatic; ‘Train up’ and ‘go’, to me these two represent a process.

Baby mama & Baby Daddy, Where did we go wrong ?

      I was going through one of the top entertainment blogs, and I came across a statement made by a celebrated Nigerian musician. He said ” Making babies is not a product of marriage, but of love”. In shock, I asked myself what is the best way for babies to be made if not through marriage?

What Do Our Children know About Love?

Children cannot be left out in the discuss of Love, as I think they even deserve more love, than any other group of people. The main focus is, how many of our adults have a proper understanding of love and what it really means? by so doing being examples to our children. We must celebrate love, not just romantic love, but love in and for all it stands for.

AFRO-PESSIMISM & THE AFRICAN CHILD

Afro-Pessimism refers to the perception of sub-saharan Africa as a region too riddled with problems of good governance and economic development. (science. jrank.org/pages/7475/AfroPessimism). I will define it literally, “AFRO” means Africa/African or black people. “PESSIMISM” means a mind fixed on expecting the worst, a belief that bad will happen. Afro-Pessimism is largely associated with the feeling of inferiority and the thought that Africa will never attain greater heights.
According to Daryl Zizwe Poe; The term ” AFRO-PESSIMISM” describes a breed of African thinkers that have accepted defeat and have lost the ability to imagine the resurrected African personality.

This write-up is focused on the African child. A large number of African children grow up to deal with poverty, tribalism , ethnicity, war and conflict etc. Even though these problems have huge negative effects, I see Afro-Pessimism as one of the key social issues facing the African personality. African children should be brought up with a mind absent of Afro-Pessimism, and the responsibilty lies on parents (mothers, fathers, aunts, uncles, guardian etc.)

★ The African child should be provided with quality education, and be taught how to balance informal and formal education.

★ The African child should be taught that no matter what he/she is going through they should hope and work for the best.

★ The African child should grow with Afro-optimism as a virtue, positive mindset, strong will, faith and self-confidence.

★ The African child should be made to understand that Africa is behind other continents in terms of development, and he/she has the value and capacity to change that.

★ The African child should be taught that leadership is rooted in service and integrity, and that it starts from your small corner.

★ They should be told that politics is all about service and stewardship.

★ They should be given reasons why Africa I will lead the world very soon.

★ They should be taught that wherever in the world they find themselves, they should be ambassadors of Africa, they should be humble, and carry themselves with pride , self respect and dignity.

★ They should be taught to respect peoples choices, and be mobilizers for social development.

There are so many things the African child should know and must be taught, but above all;
★The African child should be shown and taught to be a lover and also be shown how to love even when they don’t get it in return, they should be taught to pursue peace with all men

Picture credit: Google.com

PICTURES TO MAKE YOU SMILE & PONDER (PART 3)

“Do everything to always make children smile and be happy,  but  EDUCATION is the first thing you should give them,  whether or not they are related to you”….. Emeka Ewenike
…..WATCH OUT FOR THAT NAME…… Children and Women activist

Check out more exciting pictures.

PICTURES TO MAKE YOU SMILE & PONDER (PART 2)

Isabel Aghahowa; Example of good parenting

Julius and Isabel aghahowa

The daughter of former Super Eagles ace striker Julius Aghahowa , Isabel Aghahowa, recently released her first book – a work of fiction titled The ‘Ellegers'(165 pages) and she’s just 13years old. The beauty and brain is studying in the UK, and is also a budding actress.

The key thing about this news, is that; julius and his wife deliberately choose to invest in the Education of their daughter, and see what it has resulted to, we can only imagine what she’ll turn out to by age 18. Intending parents must plan for there unborn children, as there are a thousand and one saving schemes that can be put to use, while parents must show lots of sacrifice to guarantee quality education for their children. Parents and intending Parents have no excuse not to provide quality education for your children as its the biggest inheritance you can bequeath for them, and it does not matter if its a male or female child, they all can succeed in any and everything.

Isabel and the Book cover

SOURCE: lindaikeji.blogspot.com.

PICTURES TO PONDER ON THIS WEEKEND

THESE PICTURES SPEAK VOLUMES!

STAR KID; Moziah Bridges, the 12yr old entrepreneur

Moziah Bridges

Moziah Bridges was just nine years old when his grandmother taught him how to sew scraps of material to make bow ties.

PRAYERS!!! for Four-year-old Omonigho Abraham

Omonigbo before and after the attack

Brothers and Sisters irrespective of your religion or creed, let’s all take out time to pray for this young lad. Four-year-old Omonigho Abraham is currently battling for his life at the Lagos State University Teaching Hospital, Ikeja, after his scalp was eaten by two dogs.

The dogs chewed the skin and exposed the victim’s skull during the attack which happened on Thursday on Adegboyega Street, Akesan Estate, in the Igando area of Lagos.

PUNCH Metro had reported last week that the police arrested the two dogs for attacking Omonigho. Follow this link for more details http://www.punchng.com/news/269120/

POSITIVE SPEAKING & AFFIRMATION

As i continue on the values series, I’d like us to look at this topic. Through spoken words this beautiful world was created; Gen. 1 v 3. Make your children understand the importance of speaking and confessing the right (positive, lively, loving, and nice ) words and affirming; Prov. 22 v 6

NATURAL LEADER: Amara Chiedozie

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Amara Chiedozie strated feeding herself at just three days old

Nigerian-British baby shocks medical profession by learning to feed herself at just THREE DAYS old.

PARENTS & VALUES TRANSFER

Sonya Carson and Dr Ben Carson

As a social engineer vis-a-vis my profession as a social worker, the family is by far the most important social institution.

MAKING CAREER CHOICES FOR YOUR KIDS

In helping your kids make career choices, you must look at those things that interest them as early as a day old, these are things they have consistent passion for even as they grow older.

Things You Need to Know About Child Molesters

What is the profile of a child molester? An average child molester will offend several times before being caught, if ever. The vast majority of offenders do not get caught, and they have no criminal records. According to the investigations, only one out of ten cases of child sexual abuse is reported to law enforcement.

Should You Have Your Unborn Children in Mind, Before You Marry That Man or Woman ?By Emeka Ewenike(social worker)

I say YES ! There’s an Igbo parable that says “Be friends with the right opposite sex because of marriage”. I say not just because of marriage, but because of your unborn children.

Sex Education, Shyness & Serious Discussions By: Seun Tuyo

Ever tried to imagine one day your young child or relative comes home and asks you (without bating an eyelid) what intercourse means. What will your response be?

HERE’S HOW KIDS CAN GET BETTER GRADES: By Alice park @aliceparkny

kids doing aerobics

 

It’s not the brain but the heart that may matter more when it comes to excelling at school

PICTURES TO COMMEMORATE FATHERS DAY!

LIST OF THINGS YOU NEED TO TEACH YOUR CHILD(REN) AT EARLY AGE:By Zindagi Gulzar Hai

VERSE FOR THE GIRL CHILD

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

VERSE TO THE GIRL CHILD – Banky W

What frightens the extremists and really gives them
the spooks?
There’s nothing scarier to them than a girl with a
book

GLOBAL DAY OF PARENTS: Single parenting bad for children – Experts

As the world marks the Global Day of Parents on
Sunday (today), specialists in childcare and family
matters have called on parents to ensure proper
upbringing of their children.

MOTHERS! (Quotes that celebrates mothers)

If you’re looking you’re looking for a ride or die friend in your life, I guess your mom is late
~ Emeka Ewenike

A mother is the truest friend we have, when trials heavy and sudden, fall upon us; when adversity takes the place of prosperity; when friends who rejoice with us in our sunshine desert us; when trouble thickens around us, still will she cling to us, and endeavor by her kind precepts and counsels to dissipate the clouds of darkness, and cause peace to return to our hearts. ~Washington Irving

No language can express the power, and beauty, and heroism, and majesty of a mother’s love. It shrinks not where man cowers, and grows stronger where man faints, and over wastes of worldly fortunes sends the radiance of its quenchless fidelity like a star. ~Edwin Hubbell Chapin

A mother is a person who seeing there are only four pieces of pie for five people, promptly announces she never did care for pie. ~Tenneva Jordan

Being a full-time mother is one of the highest salaried jobs in my field, since the payment is pure love. ~Mildred B. Vermont

If the whole world were put into one scale, and my mother in the other, the whole world would kick the beam. ~Lord Langdale (Henry Bickersteth)

I remember my mother’s prayers and they have always followed me. They have clung to me all my life. ~Abraham Lincoln

Some mothers are kissing mothers and some are scolding mothers, but it is love just the same, and most mothers kiss and scold together. ~Pearl S. Buck

If you have a mom, there is nowhere you are likely to go where a prayer has not already been. ~Robert Brault, rbrault.blogspot.com

Women’s Liberation is just a lot of foolishness. It’s the men who are discriminated against. They can’t bear children. And no one’s likely to do anything about that. ~Golda Meir

The real religion of the world comes from women much more than from men — from mothers most of all, who carry the key of our souls in their bosoms. ~Oliver Wendell Holmes

The heart of a mother is a deep abyss at the bottom of which you will always find forgiveness. ~Honoré de Balzac

She never quite leaves her children at home, even when she doesn’t take them along. ~Margaret Culkin Banning

An ounce of mother is worth a pound of clergy. ~Spanish Proverb

Thou art thy mother’s glass, and she in thee
Calls back the lovely April of her prime.
~William Shakespeare

When you are a mother, you are never really alone in your thoughts. A mother always has to think twice, once for herself and once for her child. ~Sophia Loren, Women and Beauty

If evolution really works, how come mothers only have two hands? ~Milton Berle

Motherhood is priced
Of God, at price no man may dare
To lessen or misunderstand.
~Helen Hunt Jackson

Mothers are fonder than fathers of their children because they are more certain they are their own. ~Aristotle

Women are aristocrats, and it is always the mother who makes us feel that we belong to the better sort. ~John Lancaster Spalding

Motherhood has a very humanizing effect. Everything gets reduced to essentials. ~Meryl Streep

The sweetest sounds to mortals given
Are heard in Mother, Home, and Heaven.
~William Goldsmith Brown

The formative period for building character for eternity is in the nursery. The mother is queen of that realm and sways a scepter more potent than that of kings or priests. ~Author Unknown

Mother love is the fuel that enables a normal human being to do the impossible. ~Marion C. Garretty, quoted in A Little Spoonful of Chicken Soup for the Mother’s Soul

[A] mother is one to whom you hurry when you are troubled. ~Emily Dickinson

source: quotegarden.com

Timi Dakolo sends funny plea to his 6months old daughter

Children are the most beautiful gifts a married couple can get
IN THE SPIRIT OF CHILDREN’S DAY

GOLDEN GENERATION!

I was tempted to say “happy children’s day” no! no! If I’m given the right to change that phrase, i’ll change it to “happy children’s century/millenium…….” Shame to any adult that only remembers to honour or pay tribute to the golden generation on 27th may . They say they are the future, i say they are much more. They are the past, present and future, they reflect us, they better us, they succeed us. Children are the GOLDEN GENERATION!

WHEN HIS MISTRESS IS THEIR STEPMOTHER –HELPING THE KIDSTHROUGH IT

Dorothy Law Nolte writes:

If a child lives with criticism, he learns to condemn,

If a child lives with hostility, he learns to fight,

If a child lives with ridicule, he learns to be shy,

If a child lives with shame, he learns to feel guilty,

If a child lives with tolerance, he learns to be patient,

If a child lives with encouragement, he learns to be confident,

If a child lives with praise, he learns to appreciate,

If a child lives with fairness, he learns justice,

If a child lives with security, he learns to have faith,

If a child lives with approval, he learns to like himself,

If a child lives with acceptance and friendship,

He learns to find love in the world.

Adults; whether as mother or father or aunty or uncle or teacher or guardian etc, must be conscious of what should be done and what should not be done around our children, because we directly and indirectly shape their lives

FATHER INFLUENCE

A survey carried out in the prisons of America showed Over 95% of the incarcerated criminals had no FATHER INFLUENCE. Coincidence? No. Male crisis? Yes. If we should worry about anything today, it is not the economy or 2015 elections. Just as we worry about boko haram(bring back our girls), we should also worry about the trending scarcity of real men.
TO BE………CONTINUED!